St. Patrick’s Day on a Friday. The last time this occurred was 2006.
I was in my first semester at San Jose State and living with three roommates. I was single and subsequently spent a lot of time on MySpace. I’m fairly certain that I got plastered at San Jose Bar and Grill. SJBG received a lot of my disposable income in 2005-2007.
Times have changed.
I left work early on Friday, plenty of time to hit a bar or two if I desired. I’m mature now, bars are no longer disirable (for the most part). I had to hustle home for T-Ball practice.
Yes. This is my life. Eat your jealous heart out.
T-Ball practice is challenging. It’s my own damn fault I didn’t sign up to be a coach. Our assigned coach doesn’t posses any baseball-related knowledge (as he readily admits) and hasn’t taken anytime to watch a YouTube video (or two) to see how to organize his practice. The topper is the coach’s older son, who happens to be the most distruptive force in the history of T-Ball practice. Come to think of it, the son is utterly facinating. I will take notes throughout the T-Ball season on his exploits and dedicate a blog post to the kid.
Cool, now I will look forward to T-Ball practice.
I got our T-Ball Star (she’s tries and hasn’t picked flowers yet, so she’s a star in my eyes) home after practice and got ready to head to our new St. Patrick’s tradition: Taking the family to my cousin’s (Joe) and his wife’s (Erica) home.
This was our third year in attendance. It’s something my wife and throughly enjoy. Joe brines USDA Prime Brisket for 10 days. Erica bakes her own bread. They also produce a fanatic broth that includes all the other St Patty’s staples. Drinks are plentiful, with plenty of Beer, Whiskey, and Wine.
It really has ruined any other way to do St Patrick’s day.
We made it home just after midnight. I woke up in the same clothes (Green St. Patrick’s Day Gigantes t-shirt) in my daughters bed. Guess the last few drinks put me over.
I dusted off the cobwebs and made pancakes for the kids (and the adults). I’m not trying to be humble, my pancakes are fucking delicious.
Yes, I keep score at T-Ball. But since everyone scores, My score is based on the number of outs a team records.
The Golden Cubs (our team) lost to the King Snakes (2-1) in the opening game of the season the previous week.
This week’s game was a tussel with the Hammer Heads.
After one hour and two complete innngs the game mercifully ended with a score of 0-0. The Golden Cubs nearly pulled out a victory, but failed to record an out in the bottom of the second.
After the game, the kids headed up to a birthday party for our friend’s youngest son.
It feels like we have a birthday party every weekend. I can’t make anymore friends (at least with kids). We have no weekend life.
At least Saturday evening allowed some adult time. I ordered the Gennady Golovkin/Danny Jacobs fight and invited a few friends (Big Ken Jones and Dante’). Joe and I made plans the night before to make ruebens with the Corned Beef leftovers. The drunken plans were not well talked through.
We both bought everything (minus the Corned Beef on my end).
Drunks should take notes.
The Ruebens were fantastic as were the fights (minus the Roman Gonzalez robbery).
During the fight card, Dante’ brought up going to the 2nd round of the NCAA tournament the next day. Hell yes, I was in.
After the fights we caught the end of the USA vs DR in the WBC.
Great game. What a catch from Adam Jones. I found this photo afterward. There is too much good stuff going on in the background. The guy holding the beer up, eyes close, and hand outreached is my favorite. Kenny noticed MadBum on the left side of the picture. Good eyes, Ken Jones.
All in all, a great Saturday.
I woke up on Sunday anticipating heading to the Golden One Center for the Oregon/Rhode Island and UCLA/Cincinnati games.
As I looked around the house (and the subsequent mess from the night before) and heard the baby crying it became pretty clear that I should not abandon my Wife to allow me to have another day of fun. I needed to stay home. I reluctantly texted Dante’ that I had to back out. I felt like a bad friend. But Dante’ can’t kick me out of the bed and banish me to the couch.
By the way, we had a new sleeper sofa delivered Sunday afternoon.
I most likely would have been forced to test its comfort if I went to the NCAA games.
Dad Life allowed me to sleep in my own bed. Which by 6am had somehow managed to contain every child and Buster.
Wow. I have been absent of my Gigantes blog duties for a long time. Here is a quick recap of my life since my last entry on The-Three-Bs.com (which I did not renew this year).
- Promoted at my job in May 2011 (the largest reason for my posts ending).
- Had my first daughter-12/31/11. She witnessed Los Gigantes win the World Series in her first baseball season. Charmed start to her life.
- Got Married -3/24/13. She is a fan of both the Dodgers and Seahawks. What a sick joke.
- Sold our First Home-12/24/13.
- Had my second daughter-12/26/13. There is something to be said for consistency. I guess there is one week a year that my wife and I cannot resist each other. This child also witnessed a Los Gigantes World Series in her first baseball season. Daughter number #1 is living in excess at this point.
- Founded my first company (side-gig) 1/25/14
- Moved into our new home in a new city- 3/8/14
- Forced to transfer to a new Location while retaining the same job (actually closer to our new home, so it worked out well) -5/1/2014
- Had a public company represent our product for distribution 9/1/2014
- Side Business started generating revenue 5/1/2015
- Public Company could not provide adequate support and meet the requirements of our distribution contract. We were able to terminate and self distribute.
- Company grew and added a Partner and additional products and services-6/1/2016
- Third Daughter was born-10/11/16. My wife was concerned we would have another child in the final week of the year. We gritted it out and enjoyed each other, a full two months before our normal week of passion. I watched Los Gigantes implode against the Cubs on my phone using the DirecTV app. The Hospital had surprising fantastic wifi, which I truly appreciated through 8 full innings.
I have continued to be a monster fan of Los Gigantes through all of my life changes and new responsibilities. My world view has evolved as a whole little clan depend on me for life necessitates. This is to be expected.
It is my goal to post on here every once in a while. Same rules as before- Don’t take anything to seriously. There is always a twinkle in my eye.
On this St. Patty’s Day 2017- Raise a Pint and your favorite Irish Whiskey (Red Breast, anyone?). Maybe make an Irish Boilermaker and enjoy.
Just be sure to get home safe and not end up like this guy.
For the unedited fun, go to http://The-Three-Bs.com. Thanks- Shaun
Yes Miggy, that game (5/2) was your fault.
A Routine Surgery?
Pablo had successful surgery on his left hamate bone today. Andrew Baggarly (@extrabaggs) wrote: “It was such a routine procedure, the only way the surgeons could botch it woudl be to cut open his left hand by mistake.”
Many from the baseball world believe there is nothing routine about a routine ground ball.
Most surgeons would agree the same holds true for any surgery.
I have first hand experience of how there is nothing routine about a routine surgery. I had a “routine” elbow surgery which led to 4 more non-routine surgeries to correct the “routine” surgery.
It was the worst 5 months of my life. It still affects me today.
I wish Pablo a quick and healthy recovery.
Black Ops Kidnapping
Los Gigantes should have two goals while in New York:
1.) Win the series.
2.) Kidnap Jose Reyes
Reyes would be a great fit on and off the field. He already has the San Francisco style.
Winner, Winner, Jail Bird Dinner
Shin-Soo Choo was arrested on suspicion of DUI early Monday morning. Choo blew a .201 on the preliminary (That’s for you C-Lew) breathalyzer screening.
KJ, C-Lew, The Real Dante’ Hicks, and I proved how hard that is to actually do. After our Beerfest excursion, we all took turns using the breathalyzer. I was the leader in the clubhouse with a .145.
I am impressed with your ability to pound the Soju, but disappointed in your drunk decision making process.
Call a cab brother.
One third of The Three Bs is dedicated to Beer, Booze, Brew, and any other word associated with Alcohol which starts with the letter B.
With that, I give you The Three Bs versus Pliny The Younger.
I will remember 2010 for many reasons; the birth of my nephew, Los Gigantes World Series title, the purchase of my first home, the launch of www-The-Three-Bs.com, and my first sip of Pliny The Younger.
Last February my friend Dante Hicks (I know what you’re thinking; he is not the character from “Clerks”.) alerted me that he was going to Santa Rosa to visit Russian River Brewery for the release of Pliny The Younger. I will admit that was the first time I heard of Pliny The Younger. This is embarrassing because Santa Rosa is my hometown and I have patronized Russian River Brewery on many occasions.
Not this Dante Hicks, The Real Dante Hicks.
Dante turned me on to www.beeradvocate.com, there it was evident why Pliny The Younger was such a big deal, it was the 2nd rated beer in the world.
How could I miss this opportunity so close to home?
Dante got to the Brewery at opening (11:00am) and was greeted with a line of a couple hundred people long. I showed up around 11:30am and we proceeded to wait about 2 hours before we entered.
I did not feel bad about the wait as many people made a pilgrimage to taste the Younger. There was a guy in line with us who flew in from Sweden .
The stuff had to be legit.
The Younger came in at 11% abv in 2010 and went down like a champ. Beer this high in alcohol content should not go down the gullet so blissfully.
Dante and I stayed for about 4 hours. We took our time, filled a growler and drove home riding the bumps with one eye closed.
I shared the growler with Pops and KJ. They both vowed to stand in line in 2011.
I went back to Russian River Brewery with my brother in law the following day. Pliny the Younger was dry for the year. I found out it lasted for only 8 beautiful hours.
Russian River Brewery made a few changes for their Pliny The Younger release in 2011; it was set for a two week release from 2/4-2/17. The new rules were as follows: a limited number of kegs will be released each day to ensure the Younger last for two weeks, 10.5oz pours, and no growlers. You can only drink what you can put in your belly.
The last part sounds like a challenge.
Round 1: Friday 2/11/11.
RT, LJ, and I stayed at my Pop’s place on Thursday night. Pops could not partake in the festivities as he had to work. Pops is much more responsible as RT and I blew off work.
We arrived at the brewery at 9:30am; I was surprised there was nobody in line.
The situation gave me an eerie reminder of a situation in college.
In college I purchased 6 tickets for a concert two months in advance at San Jose State . The concert was scheduled for October 30th2006. My friends and I all went out to the bars before stumbling over to the San Jose State Event Center for the show. We arrived fashionably and drunkenly late when the 2nd act was suppose to go on. We encountered one problem. We were all alone on campus.
RT: “What the eff Shaun?”
SLY: “Duuude, the tickets say October 30th.”
RT: “Tickets don’t talk.”
SLY: “Well, there is not a show here, back to the bars.”
I found out at the bar the concert was cancelled over a month before. I purchased the next few rounds.
My blunder ruined any game I had with chics on this night as my friends were all too quick to bring up the situation to any female I encountered.
I was confident that Pliny The Younger was not canceled on this day, we headed to Starbucks for coffee. The thought of Younger completely made me forget a few of my job responsibilities.
SLY: “Shhhhhhhhit, I have to approve timecards before noon.”
LJ: “How are you going do that here?”
SLY: “There has to be someone with a computer around here somewhere.”
I found a FedEx Office store which had a pay to use internet service. Awesome, it only cost $.25 per minute. I should be done in less than $2.
I learned a lesson about capitalism.
The computer must have been on dial-up. It could not even load my website to approve the timecards. I waited until the $5 point.
SLY: “That’s it, I am done. I could have spent this $5 on a 10.5 ounces of Pliny The Younger and still had $.50 left over.”
I felt betrayed by our capitalistic economic model, but it actually gave me a great business idea for the skid rows of America .
Business idea: Pay-to-watch free porn on www.pornhub.com.
Here me out.
The customers who would frequent this abomination of an establishment would;
A. Be in the lowest rung of social class.
B. Not be aware that cable internet exists.
C. Not be able to justify a cover charge at a gentlemen’s club.
D. Spend all their money on booze and debauchery.
E. Not qualify for a ATM card.
F. Have never heard of www.pornhub.com, therefore believing the site is a gift from God.
Give me a cheap 1000sq foot empty space, 10 private stalls, 10 computers with their homepages all set on pornhub, and let the fine gentlemen have at it.
Nothing better than DSL will be used, I want a 5 minute video to load in 10 minutes and payments to be collected before they start (Learned from the Bunnyranch).
The price per minute will be reasonably set at $2 per minute. I expect most customers to not allow their video to fully load before they blow theirs. The revenue goal per customer will be $10.
That’s it, I am going to hell.
Alright, let’s get back to the beer.
After I surrendered $5 to FedEx Office we headed back into line at Russian River Brewery at 10:00am.
We were now second in line.
By the time the doors opened at 11:00am the line was stretched out to about 100 thirsty souls.
We sat down and I asked the bartender if my favorite beer was available.
SLY: “Do you have the Silver Bullet on draft?”
Server: “Um, No.”
I could not tell if he thought I was serious. Well played sir.
SLY: “Oh, ok, we will have three of those Pliny The Youngers.”
First Round of 2011
The Pliny’s looked and smelled amazing. They were just as I remembered from the past year, almost perfection. The abv this year was a tad down this year from 11% to 10.25%.
At last count, RT had 5 while LJ and I had 6.
RT and I recognized two friends; well we thought we recognized the two people. We debated whether they were indeed our friends.
Yes, we were now very intoxicated.
I walked over to the table that may or may not be our friends. I was as confident as Barry Zito laying down a sac bunt attempt (I had to throw in a baseball reference), which is to say (for you non-stitch heads) very confident (Zete’s led the team in sac bunts in 2010).
Is it bad when all my good Barry Zito references have nothing to do with pitching?
The two people were indeed our friends, RT and I shared a few pleasantries before heading back to our table.
Holly Ravioli Batman.
Pliny The Younger officially hit LJ. Her head was on the table. She was out.
It was time to leave.
RT and I wanted to kill a little time to sober up before we headed back to Pop’s house. I choose “Sweet Spot”, a bar right down the street.
I ordered a Guinness to sober up. I am part Irish, it is allowed.
RT and LJ each ordered a beer against their better judgment.
RT took a few sips and headed to the bathroom. LJ took a sip or two between her naps at the bar.
Bartender: “She can’t sleep at the bar.”
SLY: “She’s cool, she’s had a long day.”
Bartender: “It is 2:30pm.”
SLY: “She got up really early?”
RT returned from the bar. He did not say much.
It was my turn to use the facilities. I walked in and smelt the sour stench of vomit.
There is a reason we have bestowed the nickname of “Yack” upon RT.
RT: “Yeah, that was me.”
SLY: “It is time to leave.”
I managed to get us home safely. RT lived up to his nickname once more as he walked from the car to inside the house.
We were all passed out before 4:00pm.
Pops arrived home.
Pops: “What the heck happened to you guys?”
SLY: “Pliny The Younger.”
It was official, Younger 1 The Three Bs 0.
On a side note, LJ claimed blackout status. I believe her.
Round 2: 2/13/11.
Round 2 came about because KJ, Dante, and Pops were all unable to attend Round 1.
We were 9th in line at 10:00am Sunday morning. I did my homework during Round 1 and asked our server what time we should show up.
He was right, by opening at 11:00am the line was easily 200 thirsty fellows long.
It was on, again.
The Youngers went down just as smoothly as two days prior.
I had a game plan to drink a maximum of 3. I diverged from the game plan.
Dante led the way with 5, and KJ, Pops, and I had 4 each.
The Real Dante Hicks
We left Russian River Brewery happy and drunk. Sweet Spot was patronized for a brew. It was Déjà vu, a glitch in the Matrix.
There were animal origami dollar bills next to the handles of beer.
I stole them. I think I made $6 out of the deal.
Alcohol can alter ones judgment.
Pops drove us home but made one more pit stop. A local Irish bar. A round of Guinness and a game of pool apparently were on the agenda.
The teams were set as Dante and SLY versus Pops and KJ.
It was an epic battle of drunken pool shooting. There were no sharks in this game, just guppies.
I went on a little run and had a shot to win the game. I called my pocket, chalked the cue, reared back, and let her rip.
My aim and stroke were true. The 8-ball fell into the correct pocket…followed by the cue ball.
Pops cheered like a little school girl.
I hate losing.
We finished up our Irish water and Pops got us home safe.
Pops had Rib-Eyes on the dinner menu. How much better does food taste when you are intoxicated?
Dante and I decided to shoot the basketball around while the food was being prepared. After a few half hearted shots the ball became stuck in the net. I couldn’t jump and reach it (It is not my fault, I am short and white.).
Dante became the ball hero. He jumped. He missed. He jumped again. He missed again. It was agitating him. He mustered up one more effort. Dante lowered his legs and exploded towards the sky. The explosion accounted for an extra 2.5 inches of vertical leap which allowed him to scrape the ball with his hand which subsequently broke the balls inertia and allowed the ball to fall harmlessly to the ground.
Dante was another story.
Dante’s elbow was the first body part to hit the pavement. It wasn’t pretty and blood was shed.
We should have just grabbed a broom.
Again, alcohol clouds judgment and athleticism.
Dante and I went inside to watch the basketball game on television. This was not a safer option. A 16oz glass was broken minutes later. Shards of glass were all over the living room.
Alcohol deteriorates motor skills.
Dinner was served. The steaks looked and smelled amazing. They were still raw. KJ is as good as it comes on the grill but…
Alcohol clouds judgment.
Pops took two bites of his steak before retiring to his room, never to be seen again.
Dante and KJ eventually found the courage to drive home.
I was asleep by 8:30PM.
I was up at 5:30AM the next day, Pops was making breakfast.
Pops: “I don’t remember anything from last night. Did we cook the steaks?”
SLY: “Wow, you had two bites before passing out.”
Pops: “That stuff (Pliny The Younger) is dangerous.”
SLY: “You said it.”
Pliny The Younger 2 The Three Bs 0.
Pliny The Younger 2011 Versus The Three Bs Recap:
Pliny The Youngers consumed: 34
Verified “Yacks” from RT: 2
Blackouts: 2 (LJ and Pops)
The yearly release of Pliny The Younger is an event that I will not miss. It is a tradition that brings together many of the elements that make life so efffing amazing. Great people, beer, food, adventure, and decisions we can look back on and laugh.
Quote of the year (thus far):
Dante Hicks: “I never listen to what my body tells me, I just grab another beer.”